Monday 30 November 2009

Chapter 33

Sorry for the long wait folks but the wait is now over, hope the chapter was worth the wait...?

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I awoke the next morning still wrapped in Tylers arms and I actually felt refreshed after a very good nights sleep. I managed to get out of his arms without waking him and went for my morning run, when I returned and went to my room to go for a shower Tyler was awake.

“Morning hunny, did you sleep well?” He smiles as he lies on his back, the sheets sitting just above his waist band.

The butterflies in my tummy danced and I got shivers down my spine hearing him call me hunny again. It was a feeling that I had not felt since before he went to Sweden.

‘I still have no idea what to do, should I trust my instinct and get back with him?’

“Good Morning. I slept well thanks and you? Do you want to come for a swim?” I asked as I tried so hard not to stare at him, he looked amazing and I just wanted to lie back down beside, hold him close and tell him everything was ok.

“I had a great sleep thanks. Yeah I will come with you, I have been practising so I should be able to keep up with you now.” He smiles at me as he gets up leaning in to give me a kiss on his way past but I turned away.

I showered quickly and headed down to the pool making a start to my normal routine when Tyler came and joined me. It was clear that he had been practising and was looking much stronger in his swimming but he still stopped at about 70 lengths.

“What do you want for breakfast?” I ask him as I climb out of the water making sure not to make eye contact with him.

“Can I have some bacon and eggs etc. please? I will help to make it.” He asks climbing out of the pool and moving to put his arms around me but I quickly move before he gets the chance too.

‘I know I can’t avoid this forever.’

I went for a shower and left it on for Tyler to go in after me, although I have more shower in the house that is really the only one that is used and like me Tyler likes the water to be scalding hot.

Making a start on breakfast I think to myself about what I want to do knowing that I can’t lead Tyler on any longer. I must have got lost in my thought because before I knew what was happening Tylers arms were around my waist and he was holding me close to him. I could feel his strong chest against my back, his heart beating fast and the warmth of his breath on my face. Those butterflies insisted on dancing even though I prayed they wouldn’t.

“Let go Tyler” I warned him.

“No Gill it is about time you stopped running from me.” He turned me round to face him and switched the cooker off removing the pans from the hot hobs.

“I love you with all my heart and I am so sorry for all the hurt that I have caused and I have told you that I will make it up to you somehow.

“What else do you want me to say Gill. I am not going to get down on my knees and beg for forgiveness, I know I was wrong and I admit that but I am not going to keep saying it…”

His voice was raised and his eyes were red from anger but I still could not find the right words to say so I just lowered my head and continued to say nothing.

“That’s it Gill, I have had enough.”

He stormed off and instead of leaving like I expected him to he went up the stairs. I sat down on the floor and cried, I must have sat there for about half an hour holding my knees to my chest and he was still up there so I decided to go and see what he was doing and try to talk to him.

“What are you doing Tyler?” I ask as I enter my bedroom to find him looking out some of his clothes and other items that he still had here.

“I am getting my things together Gill, I can’t take this any more. I am hurting too you know. I thought last night that we had made a breakthrough but now you are throwing it back in my face and I can’t handle it.” His eyes were red from anger and I knew that the pain he was feeling was too much to bear.

I sat down beside him on the floor and held his face in my hands knowing that I could not let this continue any longer.

“Please don’t leave Tyler, I love you more than words could possibly explain and I can’t face life without you in it.

“Before I met you I was so independent, I didn’t need anyone in my life but I let you in and I got used to having you with me. Since the day you left me I have felt empty, as if someone had torn my heart out and left it to rot. I can’t feel like that forever more. Please come back to me again Tyler, I am so sorry.”

He sat in silence for a moment looking into my eyes searching for emotions and the truth about my feelings.

“I love you Tyler, please let’s try and make this work.” I said again as if trying to reassure him.

“Oh Gill, I love you too, I know we can get through this. I am so very sorry, I promise to never ever do that to you again, I promise I will never hurt you.” He leaned in pulling me into a big hug, we held each other so close enjoying the feeling of each other again. I took a deep breath and exhaled allowing my body to relax into him.

Finally we pulled away and looked at each other again, I could see he was unsure of what to do so I leaned in and kissed him deeply on the lips, my tongue requesting entry into his mouth. I savoured his taste wanting to make up for so much lost time.

We eventually pulled away again and Tyler looked at me with his cheeky smile and it finally looked just how I remembered it.

“What?” I asked smiling back at him.

“Can we have breakfast now hunny I am so hungry?”

I laughed taking a hold of him hand and standing up to head back down to the kitchen.

Monday 9 November 2009

So sorry!!

Hey everyone, just wanted to say so sorry that I have not updated in so long. Been so busy getting ready for the baby arriving (baby is a little boy which we are very excited about - if you want to see the scan pictures feel free to add me on Facebook!) and our flat is for sale so that has been taking up a lot of time. Hoping it will be sold any day now and we will be able to put in an offer for a lovely house that we have seen.

Work has also been so busy and I have therefore been so tired all the time.

So please be patient for a little while longer and I promise to get a chapter posted soon.

Hope you are all well and enjoying watching the Pens, the games are always on in the middle of the night here because there is such a big time difference and there is only ever a couple of games from each team on a month but I am trying to watch as many games as I can.

Take care everyone and talk to you soon xxxx